My son is autistic and plays for an u8s team. He’s highly functioning and very bright, does well in training, joins in and never misses a session. He loves his team and playing but some weeks struggles with matches. He doesn’t throw tantrums or have meltdowns but finds it hard to join in. His coaches are great but it’s hard for them to understand my son’s behaviour when we’re still learning too. My son also benefits from clear instruction and preparation but even then he may struggle on match days.
Some observations are that away matches are much harder for him, as is playing at a new home ground or pitch. Playing against children he doesn’t know is also a challenge. Playing with different children on his team may also affect him. Some weeks however he’s brilliant and will score multiple goals. Other weeks it feels like his team conceded goals because of his lack of contribution.
I’ve tried positive reinforcement, rewards and even being a little tougher with him. Sometimes one of those works, other weeks nothing works. He can just stand there, sit down or even walk off the pitch. But when I speak to him after he says he wants to play and feels like he’s trying hard. It’s heartbreaking to watch and he comes off the pitch feeling very sad.
It’s not a confidence issue per se. It’s more anxiety and/or being overwhelmed. He sometimes says “I don’t know what to do”. I suspect he’s about to be moved to a lower group which I understand but he will still face the same challenges.
I’ve seen other posts where people have advised on dealing with meltdowns or overly physical behaviour but he doesn’t suffer from those on the pitch. I’ve also seen people say autistic children shouldn’t play football but I don’t want or take away something positive that he loves.
Any help or advice on how to deal with the challenges my son and his supportive coaches face would be very much appreciated.