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Leaving a club and joining a new one

Stephen Hoare

Hi, my child has been asked to join a better team but is reluctant to leave her current team as she has friends in it.  I’ve explained that she won’t necessarily lose those friends and will gain others in this new team but she’s not buying it.  It’s a good opportunity but I don’t really want to force her to do it, but at the same time don’t want her to miss out on the opportunity.  Deep down she knows it a good idea but doesn’t want to let her mates down (which I can’t fault) Any ideas?

  • 0

    Hi Stephen, you don't say what age, but my experience of girls football (10 - 14) and boys to some extent is that friendship groups are a key motivator and very important. We have just recruited a load of new girls and to assimilate them for this season sifted by friendship groups. We have a few 'ambitious' players but they came on ability and are driven by success (not necessarily winning). Why has she been asked to join, by whom? Players (friends) or coaches? I'd suggest she tries out (with both) and talk to her about a cut off date for her decision based on when they have to register players for affiliation. 

  • 0 in reply to Paul Mady

    Hi Paul, thanks for your reply.  It is exactly that age bracket (u12 next season).  She's been asked by the coach because she's good enough to make the jump up in level, but she doesn't know anyone in the team, which is the issue really.  She has trained with them a couple of times and got on with them fine but they're not yet her 'mates' like her current team.  The other issue is simply the emotion of leaving her current team even though it's a compliment that she's been asked 

  • 0

    Hi Stephen,

    I am a new coach just starting outU13s Girls, I was just another dad taking his girl to training and matches, but see players coming off the pitch crying from being shouted at by the coaches for making mistakes was hard to take . After splitting from this team I was asked by our new manager and parents if I would coach them as I alway gave positive feedback and encouragement. we had six girls including my daughter come across from the old team and one of the girls was torn wether to come or stay as she had a good friend at the old team. Her parents approached me and explained the situation and ask if I would talk to her, I explained that it is 1 hour of football and her friend should be happy for her who ever she plays for and if she pressuring her to stay is she really a good friend? I told her to come to our training session and try it if she feels it not for her then No pressure she can always go back to the old club! I’m happy to say she’s still with us and she’s still sees her old friends from the other club. Maybe get your daughter to go and have a trial with the new team!

    all the best for the future, please let me know how it works out.

    best regards,

    kelvinThumbsup tone3