Behaviour - Disruptive players

I coach an under-8 team.

They are all nice lads but the behaviour of a few is majorly disruptive to the sessions. When I tell other coaches of the same age group about some of the issues they can relate but they acknowledge my lads seem especially problematic.

I think they've all developed in the time we've had them but I do feel if they were more focused they would have made greater strides by now because we give so many goals to the opposition and they don't seem to be that bothered - I suppose they seem to be enjoying themselves which is the main thing!

The poor behaviour manifests itself in different ways according to the child but the common themes are:

- Running off to parents during warm-ups or when they are substituted knowing they will come back on 

- Talking over me when me and my assistant are trying to coach them - often singing or talking gibberish about something unrelated to what we are doing

- giving silly answers every time we quiz them or ask them a question related to the exercise.

- saying immediately before kick-off they need the toilet (despite being asked earlier if they need to go)

- straying from what we asked them to do in a training drill e.g. if we're passing, they might kick the ball away into a goal we're not using.

- when off the pitch as subs, climbing on fences, play-fighting, playing on swings if in close proximity

It's a case of one bad apple as well, so when one misbehaves, it's like a green light for the other usual culprits to mess.

Tactics we've introduced:

- 2 min sin-bin, which increases to 5 mins if repeat offence

- threatening less game time on a match day

(the lads who mess don't seem bothered by these sanctions although I've not actually had to cut players game time yet but maybe that's because we tolerate too much bad behaviour in training)

Based on approaches I've researched and read on here, I am busy producing a document of Expectations which I intend to share with parents so letting them know the standards we expect and how we need their support. I will introduce 4 key behaviours which we will regularly remind the boys of:

- Be Safe

- Have Fun

- Be Ready to Learn – open-mindedness – willing to try other positions, listen to coaches recommendations knowing we have their interest at heart

- Be Respectful

Since the beginning of last season, in training sessions we provide a certificate to the best behaved/most focussed as well.

If I take stock of how far we've come, to be fair we've made lots of progress (but we did have two players with learning difficulties who have now left) but we still appear far behind other teams we come across as I observe other teams' behaviour.

If my players were good players and in love with the game then we would tolerate poor behaviour less but because I can tell a few of them enjoy football but don't 'love it' I feel like being too strict with them will make them stop enjoying it and stop coming. On the flip side, that might not be a bad thing but its a shame as they have a lot of potential.

Parents
  • Hey Paul, I think communicating your expectations is a good idea - I think this would help. Difficult behaviour is very tough at times to deal with, I have heard coaches suggest ignoring the badly behaved (as they are craving attention) and focus on the well behaved. I have also  heard them come up with games, tasks and roles for players on the side of the pitch. Making the matchday as enjoyable as possible is key I think. Have you spoken to the kids about what they want to do when off the pitch? Perhaps it's worth embracing that - if you haven't done it already :)   responded to a similar question/post not long ago How to Address Bad Attitude - have you seen this? May help? 

  • Hi Tim. Sorry for only replying to your response now. I did refer to the article at the time and I want to thank you for sharing.

    It's a very similar to situation to ours but the advice Vinny provided was (1) reassuring, as we use a lot of those techniques anyway (2) insightful/inspirational - for example, the use of the 3D C's (Communication, Cooperation, Collaboration) is something I am now even more conscious about. 

    I have produced (but not yet fully designed) an Expectations e-book for parents and kids. I've covered a section on the 3C's in an attempt to provide parents with clarity around our values and approach so they are fully aware of what behaviour and culture we are trying to encourage.

    Hopefully once I've circulated and fully communicated the Expectations Guide I'm producing, we'll get more support from parents and the clear messaging and standards we expect will resonate with the kids more, leading to much improved behaviour.

    There's only so much we can though and sometimes there has to be a degree of acceptance that they are 8 yrs old and some kids mature faster than others. 

    Even though I know they could be better at football with more focus and higher quality practice, they all seem to love playing and therefore, as coaches, we should be proud that we've managed to help put a smile on their faces.

Reply
  • Hi Tim. Sorry for only replying to your response now. I did refer to the article at the time and I want to thank you for sharing.

    It's a very similar to situation to ours but the advice Vinny provided was (1) reassuring, as we use a lot of those techniques anyway (2) insightful/inspirational - for example, the use of the 3D C's (Communication, Cooperation, Collaboration) is something I am now even more conscious about. 

    I have produced (but not yet fully designed) an Expectations e-book for parents and kids. I've covered a section on the 3C's in an attempt to provide parents with clarity around our values and approach so they are fully aware of what behaviour and culture we are trying to encourage.

    Hopefully once I've circulated and fully communicated the Expectations Guide I'm producing, we'll get more support from parents and the clear messaging and standards we expect will resonate with the kids more, leading to much improved behaviour.

    There's only so much we can though and sometimes there has to be a degree of acceptance that they are 8 yrs old and some kids mature faster than others. 

    Even though I know they could be better at football with more focus and higher quality practice, they all seem to love playing and therefore, as coaches, we should be proud that we've managed to help put a smile on their faces.

Children
No Data