Why did that happen in my coaching session?

Why did that happen in my coaching session?

Do you reflect effectively after your coaching sessions? Here, Steve Dorey, FA county coach developer, discusses the importance of learning from experience.

As discussed in earlier blogs, reflection is a key part of learning from experience. Building on those ideas, we’ll now look at the role of reflection after your coaching session. Donald Schön – the professor who developed the concept of reflective practice - terms this type of reflection as reflection-on-action: looking back to see how things went and, crucially, why.

My own experience of reflecting on coaching sessions suggests that I must be a terrible coach. I frequently focus on the things that didn’t go quite as expected such as: the practice returns I wanted, lack of player engagement or the fact I talked too much – the list could go on well beyond the length of this article.

Even better if?

However, there is a useful framework to try in order to find a better balance of memories. The following framework has been used on formal coach education courses:

  • what went well?
  • even better if?
  • changes for next time?

This can help direct your thinking away from just the negatives and frames your experiences in a much more positive light.

I also found that my reflections were consistently descriptive and transactional: I did this and I got that. They read more like a commentary on the session and didn’t make me consider what the goals of the session or coach behaviour were – I needed more.

Exploring your thinking and actions

Searching for further depth, I was introduced to business coach, Graham Alexander, and his GROW model. Originally conceived for use in coaching in the corporate world, this model starts with what I was going after in the session, for example: central midfield players recognising when and how to play forward. It also includes the different things I tried in pursuit of achieving it: play underloaded/matched up/overloaded.

The model (slightly modified below) asks you to consider:

  • Goals: what were you trying to achieve?
  • Reality: what happened?
  • Options: what did you try?
  • Will: what impact will have/has had on your coaching?

This helped. It felt like it gave me the opportunity to explore my thinking and actions. Over time, I could then see what patterns emerged.

For example: if the players were blaming each other for misplaced passes I tended to bring this to a halt as soon as possible. This pattern got me thinking: what does that say about me?

I hadn’t really considered a coaching philosophy before but the more I thought about it, it became clear to me that one of my core values is to have a ‘no blame culture’. Therefore, the players’ behaviour was the opposite to something I strongly believe in and stopping it made sense. I was making progress.

If you haven’t done so already, you can read my previous blog posts here: