Posting mainly just to share sympathy. We were completely wrongly banded in our U8s for the start of the season and have ended up the wrong side of results like 15-1, 10-0, 17-0 etc.

Our lead manager wrote to the local FA to ask about this but never got a reply, neither did the club. We have been rebanded for this next period but there are a couple of teams who we played in pre-season friendlies so we know they are still significantly stronger, so it's unlikely we've been put in the 'bottom' league as we requested.

Not sure if the same kind of mercy rules exist at U12s but depending on the opposition once it's neared a cricket score they have at least allowed extra players on the pitch, or encouraged their team to have 5+ passes before a shot. Unfortunately one or two others were just keen on stat-padding and one even sent their GK up, which is ridiculous at U8/5 a side.

A lot of the lads in our team are fairly new to football, don't watch professional games etc. One of the teams we played had over 100 appearances in other competitions between them ,they were just 'new' to our league.

In terms of how you might manage it, not sure if you'd deem this suitable for U12s but we dropped right to basics and started keeping a tally of successful passes, tackles, saves, shots etc. That galvanised the group a little bit and they were keen to see who came out 'top' of that chart after each game.

I'm in the same situation at u10 and like you I'm looking for answers. All I have to offer is understanding your plight. I raised our situation with the club only to be told contacting the league was a waste of time as they would NOT move us. It decimated our squad to the minimum, so the "power play" rule has been useless as we have no subs anymore!

The problems I have had for some weeks now are:-

1. Lack of engagement in training
2. Lack of effort in the second half when we're usually several goals behind.

The squad just don't see the point in putting in the effort in training or matches anymore as they believe it's a foregone conclusion. Behaviour is getting difficult to manage etc. Last Sun 5 mins into the second half I tried to encourage a winger to get involved and his answer was "what's the point we can't win" and I had no answer to give him. None. I've ran out of reasons, excuses, "it's just a bad run it's not forever" etc doesn't wash anymore the lads aren't stupid.

Watching the love of the game being slowly beaten out of the lads Sunday after Sunday after Sunday is concerning to me for their welfare. But nobody else cares it seems and it doesn't help we're coming up against "win at all costs, preferably by a huge goal difference (which I might add isn't counted at our age group!)" opposition coaches.

I just don't know what to do to get them re-engaged, maybe we'd be better off just throwing in the towel and folding the team? Which seems crazy given I only did my Level 1 maybe 6 months ago and already I'm thinking of giving it up.

Thanks all for your replies. I wanted to come back on this as I'm in two minds really. 

One part of me thinks: "oh well", but the other part wants to kick up a bit of a stink on it and fight here, as what's happening is not on. There's a lot to unpack.

Our team are now going to fold at the end of the season - and I put the blame for this squarely at the feet of the local league as a consequence of our situation.

We are a nice club and our team is full of good kids who like playing football. None of them are ever going to be professional, but that's totally not the point. They like training, like playing and they enjoy a good match. Obviously, if they win they like it more, but they're also good losers.

Our season - and our age group - has been totally ruined by this league structure which - if I'm going to be even more combative - highlights some really bigger society problems. I've decided that the root cause of why this is all so messed up is because the very top academy teams are creating a culture that means people prioritise 'winning' by dropping down divisions to avoid playing those at the top, so your everyday teams (like us) are being affected.

Let me explain...

Two weeks ago we played a league match against a club who are an established academy. They are so obviously an 'A' division team but have dropped down to B for some unknown reason: probably because the top team in the A division plays in the JPL and wipes the floor with everyone else. Or possibly because they play in a different league and so view the B division as training.

After 12 matches, they have a goal difference of +60. They've scored 71 goals, which is 21 more than the next team. They have conceded 11 goals, which is the lowest in the league by far. They would be higher up the table but that goal difference masks the fact they haven't bothered turning up to quite a few matches, so their opposition has received a walkover.

When we played them, all we got was grief: the ball wasn't hard enough, standards of refereeing weren't high enough, we've driven a long way etc etc - it was so far away from 'fun and enjoyable'. Shouty coaches, shouty parents...levels of skill that were just so at odds with the average standard of Under 12s football in the rest of the B division.

So, you can imagine how being battered 13-0 went down with both the players and parents, not to mention us coaches.

We now have kids who have pretty much given up. In fact, they HAVE actually given up.

We struggle to field a full team for matches and have played most matches with no subs because kids would prefer to do hockey, tennis, rugby etc and have fun than turn up to get smashed by a team who should be higher up. As coaches, we've seen demonstrable improvements in HOW the team play, but we've never going to compete against an academy.

So, demoralised kids who now want to give up football. Coaches who have had enough and decided to stop at the end of the season. And parents who are fed up of driving an hour to take their kid to a match where the result is a foregone conclusion.

The thing is, we're not bottom of the league - the team below us has let in 93 and scored 13 - so if we're feeling rubbish, how must it feel for them?

It's easy to dismiss this as ranting / moaning / sore loser etc, but the point is this:

100% we support stronger clubs and academies and we get that there are some gifted kids out there. But leagues should be doing more to make sure that the best players and clubs play in their A division. They should be intervening when it's really obvious that a league is mismatched (like they do at lower year groups).

By not doing this, they've effectively said they're willing to lose 20 - 40 kids from each division who aren't able to get a competitive match in.

More generally though, no-one does anything when you do get a mismatch like this from the perspective of the 'win at all costs' attitude of the higher ranked clubs. As a coach, it's probably the main reason why I'm stopping: I just don't have time to deal with unpleasant academy coaches who think their kids are all going to be professionals. I'm a parent volunteer; we just want a good runout and competitive matches, not routs.

Average FC should be miles away from the JPL-type teams, but we're so intrinsically impacted by it.

Some will say we could drop down a division, but we have started playing teams in the division below us in friendlies and we're comfortably beating them, so all the signs are that we're in the right division and the issue is that the league aren't doing enough to discourage academies or better teams from dropping down.

I don't begrudge the top academies: they have a job to do and they do it well. They have some amazingly talented kids. But I do take aim at those who are in the vicinity of the top who choose to drop down a division rather than play the very best. They're prioritising winning over balanced divisions. What does an academy learn from beating a village team 13-0? Who benefits from that situation? 

Anyway, no-one will read this and no-one will care, which is why I'm stopping. Being a volunteer coach has been enjoyable at times, but most of the time it's totally thankless and I'm really looking forward to being away from the academy coaches and parents who think their kids are all Haaland; we're now working hard to find alternative clubs for our players who are good kids, who just want to play somewhere fun and enjoyable, where it's reasonably competitive and not a bloodbath each week.

Received a flurry of notifications today, sorry to read about the situation you find yourselves in. As it turns out since my original reply we have been demoted a third time and it's now starting to look a little bit more like football. Yet to get another win but we've had a couple of draws in this most recent rotation, and last weekend we were 4-1 with 5 minutes to go before it ended in a 4-4.

I hope you can find other clubs for your players and just acknowledging at least one person has read your reply above.